How Does One Guarantee Staying Married?
Is it possible to divorce proof your marriage, especially a marriage to a pilot?
For those of us married to pilots, we've heard the warnings - Never date a pilot. They cheat.
What happens when we not only date them, but marry them?
Have children with them?
As a 33 year married pilot wife, I've invited another Pilot Wife on the show, and she's going to share why it may not be 100% possible, but one can sure increase the odds of staying married.
Kameran is a pilot wife, boy mom, and certified relationship coach. She is passionate about helping couples learn tools and develop habits to divorce proof their marriage! Her husband, Mohammed is from Cairo originally, so they’ve navigated not only pilot life but immigration and cultural differences.
After one failed marriage, Kam was committed to making this marriage work, and she got busy working on thing when they started clearly going wrong.
We talk about Kam’s first marriage and details about why it didn't work; the role personal development and growing herself played in their separation and her realization that it wasn’t going to work.
We cover expectations and having good communication before marriage and at all points throughout the marriage; the role financial stress and challenges can play on a marriage, especially if these things are not discussed before marriage.
And, as in Kam's case, cultural differences as well, as he is from another country! Sri Lanka!
The difference between Sex and Intimacy - there is one. Don't confuse them.
Are marital differences and conflict a “red flag?” No, no reason for it to be a definite YES. Emotional Intelligence is key to navigating differences.
Little things matter, and if not mindful, these can lead to big things that tear the pilot couple apart.
Fair and Equal are not the same thing.
The 4 Myths of Marriage.
1) Your partner will automatically know what to say/do - they should just know - well, they don’t. We have to communicate it.
2) Navigating your "differences" - not everything has a solution and not everything needs fixed. You don’t have to agree on everything. No one does. A marriage is no different.
3) Happy couples don't argue - wrong! I didn’t get that memo, did you? We cover “fair arguing” and crossing boundaries, unacceptable behaviors .
4) Being married a long time means a boring sex life - big myth. This is where intimacy plays a huge role. How we have been conditioned as male and female into the roles we play. Is there something wrong if the pilot doesn’t walk in after a long trip ready to “do it?”
Let’s normalize getting help with better relationships, sex, communication and mental health.
Kam is a 2 on the Enneagram and her husband is a 7.
Listen in to Learn more!
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