Managing Stress with Mel Robbins’ Let Them Theory

Stress is part of life—but how we respond to it determines whether it takes us down or fuels our growth. In Mel Robbins’ The Let Them Theory, (my book recap video) one powerful section focuses on managing stress by letting go of the belief that we can control other people, and instead shifting our mindset back to what we can control: ourselves.

The core idea is simple yet transformative:

👉 The more you allow others to live their lives, the better your own life becomes.

When we stop obsessing over other people’s choices, reactions, or opinions, we reclaim our own peace of mind. This can be especially hard in dealing with family and adult children for sure. I've learned my lessons on this more than once.

Key Takeaways from the Let Them Theory on Stress

✔️ Let Go of Control – Stop attaching your happiness to other people’s actions. Their behavior isn’t about you—it’s about them.

✔️ Shift Stress into Joy – Stressful moments are invitations to reframe your mindset. You can choose curiosity and calm instead of anger and frustration.

✔️ Be a Non-Emotional Observer – Practice stepping back and observing situations without taking them personally. This creates space for better decisions and less drama. When you find yourself moving beyond observing, as in tying to change or problem solve - do some thought work - why? Why do you feel compelled to do this? What will it accomplish? Are you open to others doing this to you? Do you have the right or agency to do this?

✔️ Try the Airport Stress Test – Daily challenges—like delayed flights, traffic, or long lines—are perfect opportunities to test your ability to pause and respond differently.

✔️ Pause Before Reacting – A simple pause can transform conflict, reduce regret, and keep you grounded in stressful moments.

Why This Matters

Stress will never disappear, but your relationship to it can change. By applying The Let Them Theory to everyday life, you begin to notice how much lighter and calmer you feel when you stop trying to manage everything (and everyone) around you.

You don’t have to carry the weight of other people’s choices.
You don’t have to react to everything that happens.
You can choose peace, perspective, and freedom.

What’s Next?

If you’ve read Mel Robbins’ The Let Them Theory, what’s your biggest takeaway? Drop a comment and share your thoughts!

And stay tuned for the next topic in this series: Fearing Other People’s Opinions—and how to break free from people-pleasing once and for all.

📌 Watch the full Let Them Theory playlist for more insights.
📩 Grab my free guide at LowerToxicLife.com
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